Friendships never expire.
Even so, many people over 60 find it challenging to make new friends. You may be near the end of your career, or you may have finished it. The kids have grown up. You may have lost touch with long-time friends due to relocation or, sadly, death. And let’s face it, most people don’t strike up conversations with strangers at the grocery store.
The truth is, making new friends after 60 isn’t just possible — it’s essential.
Having strong social connections is one of the strongest predictors of happiness and brain health. High-quality friendships are also associated with longer lifespans, according to research. Over the course of eight years, study participants who had friends were 24% less likely to die. In addition, there was also a 9% increase in the likelihood of exercising, a 17% reduced risk of depression, and a 19% lower risk of having a stroke when you have good friends.
And the good news? It’s not like you’re starting from scratch. With decades of life experience, wisdom, and stories to share, you have much to offer. It’s time to turn those connections into meaningful ones.
If you want to form real friendships, here’s how — despite your age.
1. Start with Your Existing Network
Take a moment to consider who is already in your orbit before you set out to meet new people. Consider your neighbors, friends of your adult children, colleagues from church, or even acquaintances from the gym.
In other words, rekindle dormant connections. You could send a friend a text or an email. Or, invite a former colleague to lunch or coffee. It is flattering to be remembered, and most people are just as eager to connect with you as you are.
Additionally, look through your phone contacts or social media friends list for someone you haven’t spoken to in years.
2. Join Groups with Shared Interests
If you already enjoy doing something, consider doing it with others to make friends. As a result, a shared activity forms a natural connection.
Think about;
- A book club at your local library and community center
- A gardening group
- Walking or hiking clubs
- Art or photography classes at a community college
- A travel group for 60+ adults, such as Road Scholar or ElderTreks
- A local choir or community theater
If you’re not an expert, don’t worry. The bonding experience can be even greater when you join something as a beginner.
As an added benefit, these groups often meet regularly, allowing members to stay in touch.
3. Volunteer for a Cause You Care About
When you volunteer, you make a positive impact while meeting people who share the same values.
Volunteering in a food pantry, an animal shelter, a museum, or a hospital lets you work with others in a meaningful, low-pressure environment. Often, in situations where you share a common purpose, trust is easily established, and conversation flows smoothly.
Even better? There are a lot of volunteers who stick around for a long time, so you’re likely to see the same faces repeatedly.
4. Take Advantage of Online Communities for Older Adults
Online friendships are a thing, and they aren’t just for young people.
Meetup, Nextdoor, Facebook Groups, and even Stitch (a social network specifically for people over 50) offer digital communities that lead to in-person gatherings.
From hiking groups to knitting groups to local happy hours, there are groups for everything. Retirees also use these platforms to organize day trips and coffee meetups. Being willing to take the first step and showing up is all it takes.
5. Say Yes More Often
In the words of Eric Schmidt, “Find a way to say yes to things. Say yes to invitations to a new country, say yes to meet new friends, say yes to learn something new.”
In other words, sometimes a new friendship begins with a simple “yes.”
Even if you’re not sure you’ll like an event or gathering, consider saying yes to invitations, especially if they involve people your own age. It often takes a bit of momentum to establish social connections. As you put yourself in situations where conversations can happen, they become more natural.
When social anxiety creeps in, remember that everyone feels awkward at times. Chances are, someone else in the room is also looking for a connection.
6. Go Where People Gather (Regularly)
Being a “regular” can make a surprising difference.
You’re more likely to bump into the same people if you consistently go to the same place, whether it’s a coffee shop, farmer’s market, library, senior center, or even the dog park. As familiarity grows, friendliness follows.
The first step is to smile and make a casual comment. It can be as simple as saying, “I see you here often” to begin a friendship.
7. Be the One Who Reaches Out
Initiation is one of the most common regrets older adults have. The best way to prevent this is to be the one who invites. Invite someone to take a walk with you, grab lunch, or attend a local event with you.
What if it feels too forward? You can start small with something like “Would you like to join me for a cup of coffee after class?” This is a great place to start.
You should keep in mind that most people crave connection, but are too timid to initiate contact. When you take the initiative, you aren’t bothering them; you’re giving them something to look forward to.
8. Consider a Senior Living Community or Social Club
Having trouble meeting people nearby? Consider moving to a senior community or joining a social club for individuals 60 and older, such as the AARP, SilverSneakers, or the Red Hat Society.
Today’s retirement communities are vibrant hubs of friendship and activity. There are classes and events for everyone, from group travel to yoga, art classes, and movie nights. Residents often compare the experience to “college for grown-ups,” but with better food and fewer homework assignments.
Not ready for a big move? Today, many cities offer centers for active adults with similar programs.
9. Let People Know You’re Open to New Friends
There are times when you just have to name it.
In other words, don’t be afraid to talk to someone if you feel a connection with them, such as “I enjoyed talking with you. Could we grab coffee sometime?” Or, “I’m looking to expand my social circle—want to exchange numbers?”
At first, it may feel awkward. However, being honest and open often leads to meaningful results. Real connection is built through vulnerability, not perfection.
10. Don’t Let Past Friendships Hold You Back
New friendships are naturally compared with previous ones. Don’t give in to temptation.
Long-term friends may have known you throughout decades of life changes. New friends won’t have that history, and that’s fine. Don’t be distracted by nostalgia, but rather by what the connection offers today: new stories, mutual support, and fresh energy.
Friendships built later in life can still be deep, authentic, and life-changing.
11. Work on Being a Good Friend, Too
The best way to get great friends is to be a great friend.
- Genuinely show interest in others.
- You should listen more than you speak.
- Follow up. (A simple “It was great meeting you!” text goes a long way.)
- Keep your word and be kind.
- It’s okay to share parts of your life, but avoid oversharing too soon.
When people meet someone warm, curious, and trustworthy, their attraction to them deepens.
12. Give It Time—and Grace
There will be times when a new connection won’t lead to a lifelong friendship, and that’s okay. Building friendships requires time, patience, and repeated interactions. Don’t give up just because your first few attempts didn’t work.
Continue to be curious. Stay kind. And, most importantly, keep showing up.
Friendship after 60 isn’t about quantity, it’s about meaningful quality. And it is possible. More than that, it’s worth it.
Final Thoughts
While making friends after 60 requires more intention, it also brings less pretense and more appreciation. You’re likely more open to authentic connection now that you’re wiser and clearer on what matters.
You’re not too old. You’re not too late. And you’re not alone.
So, go ahead and take the first step. Smile. Say hello. Show up. Invite someone in.
The second half of life not only offers more freedom but also some of the most fulfilling friendships.
FAQs
Why is it often harder to make friends after 60, and what are the benefits of doing so?
As we age, forming new friendships becomes increasingly challenging. Retirement, relocation, and the loss of loved ones naturally shrink our social circles. Without the built-in environments of work or raising a family, opportunities for connection are fewer. Still, forming new friendships after 60 can significantly boost mental and physical health — reducing loneliness, lifting your mood, and even extending your life.
What are some practical, low-pressure ways to meet new people in my community?
Start with your interests. Join a local book club, gardening group, or art class. Community centers, libraries, and senior centers often host activities for older adults. Volunteering for a cause you care about can also introduce you to like-minded people. Even regular visits to the same coffee shop, park, or gym can lead to casual conversations. Online platforms designed for seniors can also be helpful — just stay mindful of safety.
How can I move from casual acquaintances to deeper friendships?
After making a connection, follow up. Invite them for coffee, a walk, or an event. Show genuine interest, share a bit about yourself, and maintain consistent contact. Friendship deepens through trust, shared values, and time.
What if I’m shy or feel awkward initiating conversations with new people?
Start small: smile, say hello, or offer a compliment. Ask open-ended questions like, “What do you enjoy most about this class?” Focus on curiosity, not self-consciousness. Most people are open to friendly conversation.
What are some common pitfalls to avoid when trying to make new friends later in life?
Don’t expect instant best friends. Avoid dominating conversations or being overly negative or pessimistic. Stay open to friendships across generations. Don’t get discouraged by rejection—it’s normal. Keep trying, and you’ll find meaningful connections.
Image Credit: MART PRODUCTION; Pexels
